Helicopters and Rain

Recently the local news has run stories on helicopters circling random locations. The news stories usually attribute it to any of residential neighborhoods here in the Valley. Only recently was it announced that two of those sightings were attributed to the National Guard, which was patrolling the rio grande valley as part of Rick Perry's "Border Violence Spillover Contingency Plan". I searched for the details on this plan online and nothing. Most stories covered the stories and a few quotes by Perry about how this plan will help protect Texas residents. Exact details on on this "Plan" are not available because it seems to be literally a secret. I believe one quote stated how divulging the "Plan" will hinder its purpose. I have no idea how a plan to protect Texans involves helicopters. I don't know what type of technology these helicopters are equipped with but regardless i am doubtful that from that height, they are able to identify "Zetas" or whatever it is they are looking for [at this point we haven't been told of their targets either, most likely because telling us who we are being protected from may be divulging to much].
My fear is that this is the beginning and the end might include ground troops. In my opinion, there has been no spillover. Is this muscle flex for show? Much more, it seems that these helicopters were "mysterious" because the public was not informed of their presence. When will we be told about what is going on in our valley? In a strange twist, I am more fearful of the national guard and Perry's agenda than the Mexican cartels on the other side.

Here is the link to the helicopter story



In other news, it has rained most of the week. Good for the grass and my thoughts. It puts me in a pensive mood, as noted above. I have started to write more about my father which seems to be my "wall". I don't hate my father now because I never learned who he really was. The stories of my mother and up until the end of their marriage in my teen years are the only memories i can go on. But in my writing when I write about him I am able to see the connection to myself. I think that is mostly why he is the "wall". My father represents, in my eyes, a close likeness to myself. Sometimes I think I unintentionally aspired to be like him. He didn't seem close to anyone in the family, era un birinche, and felt others were ashamed of him. Does that describe me? Sometimes it does, and then I feel I am also like my mother, worrisome. I'm lucky to have their faults in me, because I am not alone, and neither are they. We can hate our family, but I don't see much point of it. I think there are more worthy people to hate (in most cases) than family. It seems to easy to hate family because they are part of our daily lives. How can we not dislike them at some point or another after spending so much time together? But I feel that my father is the person that I am most defined by. His presence, absence, and actions. I do not use the word influence in such as a positive term, but strictly neutral. My father has influenced me and I am just realizing it in my writing.

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I turned in what should be my second to last thesis rough draft. I'm hoping it doesn't get to many corrections. With my poems, after reading them again, I don't feel they are strong. Maybe a few, but the majority need a lot of work. Sometimes I will come up with an idea, but I'm hesitant to reproduce styles like those of raul salinas and images in poem. But I just want to graduate...I'm tired.

Blast from the Past

Yes, i just used that cliche. But it fits what happened in the past two days. I don't think throughout my life i have had many friends but the ones i do are important to me. And about two days ago i reconnected w/ the person whom i consider my first college friend. It's strange sometimes to go back to the past because it makes me think of how much time has changed me for better and worse. It's been so long. I think of what i have done in those 7 years since, and sometimes i think it wasn't much. There are things there, but maybe I have forgotten them. Anyways, I am happy to have my friend back. It's as if i have regained a chunk of my memories back...any little bit that someone can help me remember is good. Not sure where my point is going. I should be writing here more often, at least as a device for stress relief.
Final Thoughts: happy just to be getting closer to the end of the semester. i am almost there. then what? maybe teaching. at least i have a job right now. I can take my time with it a bit. maybe i can get published...but i really have to work on my poems.
Right now feels like a period of inconsistency? I can't find the right word. I haven't come up with any new poems, mainly focusing on the ones i have written.
Okay, this is going nowhere...lol
*gone*