mostly. I'm still waiting for word from the conference I applied to. They said a response would be sent by July 30th. Today is August 2nd. Do rejections take longer? lol I hope not. Planning a trip to Austin soon. I can't wait. Relaxation. Partying. Art. I'm thinking about moving there. Not now, maybe in two years. Maybe I'll got to PhD school in San Marcos (not Austin because I don't think I'll make it).
Is there anything more I can do to make this blog more interesting? gossip? secrets?
Truth: sometimes i don't like reading other's poetry. meaning, it takes a lot of work for me to get interested. maybe it depends on subject matter, but i haven't figured it yet.
I wish i could get a full-time job teaching. I am a bit jealous (envious) of one of my poetry friends. My friend posted on a networking site about earning a job which i am figuring is full-time work. We both are friend/acquaintance of the Chair. i suppose they knows each other better and influenced the outcome. My friend is very capable, great poet, and has been looking for work.
I think I realized I have to start applying to different universities. I get upset though. I think I'm good for the job and i know how things work, you know people and you get jobs. that's likely how i got this one and also teaching...but just get upset/jealous.
I think i'm more upset at myself though since it's moments like those that make me feel idle. as if i haven't done much to show progress. and if i would be more assertive and follow through with my projects i would have what i want.
*sorry blog, for purging these emotions on you all the time. who else would i tell?*
*and sometimes i believe i want what others have*
*ah, envy*
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