Officially (Almost)

A lecturer (ENGL 1301). That's my new title at the local community college. Can you believe it, me? some random person from Alton, who studied biology and went from one random job to another. That's me. This new title could possibly change my life. It might motivate me enough to dream more (than i do) and go through with it. Conferences, publications, networking.

[i'm addicted to "16 and pregnant" on MTV]

I feel proud of myself. I am doing this. I applied, I wasn't afraid and I didn't back away. and I think I can do more in the future. I'm respected [and probably soon disrespected by students. lol]. I even thought of going back for a few hours of Biology so i could teach college level biology, although the truth is that its difficult, but i do like challenges.

[my first semester as a graduate student in biology i had a panic attack and never went back]

Change is coming soon, and maybe I can be involved in that change. I can do this (since technically i haven't started teaching just yet). I took a look at the required textbook and the essays are basic ones. I can use supplemental readings and the question is how can i bring in Mexican American, Chicano/a, Poch@ ideas into the mix? ---Machicho? Sure why not (for now). Como puedo usar las ideas Machich@s?

[i looked up Machich@ and couldn't find anything to solid]

Can I make a difference because that's my goal. I need to make a difference and reach my audience. students are my audience. This is going to be good.

Select Pocho Definitions

I'm finally getting the opportunity to write about pocho a bit. The following are definitions I found during my thesis research. I was hoping to use the following as part of the thesis but realized it was getting to scholarly and wasn't reflecting on my poetry as necessary.
But, I am interested in the history of "pocho" and its definition which has slightly changed over a long period of time. My biggest question is why it hasn't changed. Does it offend Chicano/a's? Why hasn't "pocho" become an empowering image?

Here are the definitions w/ sources cited:

1949: “a dialect roughly in southern Arizona, southern California and the upper part of Sonora, Mexico. Ex. pedir raite (hitch-hike)” (Hayes 48).

1965: “A derogatory label given by Mexican nationals to persons of Mexican de- scent born in the U.S.” (Perales 100).

1968: “Students who are about half Mexican and half Anglo; they speak a hodge- podge which is known in Mexican communities as pocho” (Hernandez 88).

1980: “bastardized” (Solis 44).

1980: “low-class Mexican American” (Berk-Seligson 100).

Sources

Berk-Seligson, Susan. "A Sociolinguistic View of the Mexican-American Speech Community: A Review of the Literature." Latin American Research Review 15.2 (1980): 65-110. Electronic.

Hayes, Francis C. "Anglo-Spanish Speech in Tampa, Florida." Hispania 32.1 (Feb., 1949): 48-52. Electronic.

Hernandez, Luis F. "Teaching English to the Culturally Disadvantaged Mexican-American Student." The English Journal 57.1 (Jan., 1968): 87-122. Electronic

Perales, Alonso M. "The Audio-Lingual Approach and the Spanish-Speaking Student." Hispania 48.1 (March, 1965): 99-102. Electronic

Solis, Theodore. "Munecas de Chiapaneco: The Economic Importance of Self-Image in the World of the Mexican Marimba." Latin American Music Review / Revista de Música Latinoamericana 1.1 (Spring - Summer, 1980): 34-46. Electronic

---

Something I take from the sources are the various groups it refers to: students, music, language, nationality, and adopted country. There is a complexity when referring to "pocho" and I do not believe to be simply a derogative term. On the surface the insults might seem uninspired, but I see a lot of tension and social discrimination.

Thoughts for now, but I'm hoping there is enough to do more research and reach some sort of conclusion/concept.

[end transmission]

Changes?

Next month or two might bring changes.
1. applied for a adjunct ENG position at local community college
2. applied for full-time position at Writing center at current college
3. co-worker might quit.

I'm happy with all three, but the ones most important are # 1 & 2. Focus on those since they may mean more responsibility for me, and I think it's about time. I'm getting tired of sitting at a desk all day. It doesn't even help me write. At a meeting a few days ago i lost interest and attempted to write a poem but nothing came out of it. My writing lately has improved but is also less frequent. I should work on revisions and submitting mostly. I have a presentation in a few minutes so i'm going to make this short. Also, I apologize for not doing the "pocho" definitions yesterday. I was feeling old and fell asleep before 10pm.
I'm going to end with a poem I drastically revised for a reading at a local cafe/eatery. The poem is based on pulga (aka flea market) experiences.



encontré

ramienta, buganvilias
piratas y cojidas

busco de todo
que es taboo

la virgen y la santísima
los sobadores
la idioma de la patria
illegales, trabajadores, padres

ven a mirar
lo que te falta

rusted tonka trucks
peliculas gay
entre platanos y papayas
mi papa con la otra

Canto Mundo

I just realized I haven't talked about applying to Canto Mundo. It was a bit last minute and I am optimistic I will be chosen, although the reality is that I won't. My poems could use some extra work (i always think that, do you?) and I'm not sure if I fit their criteria. They mention identifying with Latino/a, but i'm trying to identify with poch@. That is my project for the year. Create a description and identity for poch@, just as Latino/a and Chicano/a have earned their titles. Maybe I should just start writing about poch@ based on my thesis work. I need to review all the definitions i obtained. I hope I still have that work and I wasn't stupid and deleted it. I will check later tonight and post on the topic again.

On another note, I'm running a 10K this weekend which means no drinking. I am mentioning that so I stay away from alcohol, even though poch@ research would go well with it. After Saturday.

Cliche New Start

The new year started off with "a bang". Here's a list:
a. brother almost blew his face off with fireworks. (he's fine, no damage other than a really good scare)
b. Had a get together at Poch@'s.

That's actually the end of the list, which should require three items (next time).

But I want to expand on the idea of poch@ this year. Maybe attend some seminars and such. I'm hoping to. I'm also wanting to make D&I house more of a hang out for artist (and others). I want people to have fun, I want to have fun. Fun = (another list)
1. movie nights
2. game nights
3. reading nights
4. cookouts are a required constant
5. random nights

That's what I want my place to be. I started off with the paintings and i'm hoping to get more done. Yes, today's post has nothing to do with literature, in the literal sense...?
Again, just ideas that I am trying to complete this year. Maybe a resolution is to finish what i start. That sounds good. complete it. finish it. network. do more. do more.don't let work get me down. be more positive/strict with myself. i can do it.

thank you for listenting...whoever you are. lol

"1st" Day of Vacation

Finally, after a week off from work I feel as if I am on vacation. Vacations during holidays shouldn't count. Most of the time is spent preparing, attending, and recovering from holiday celebrations. Adding to the stress of Christmas (to much money spent), my neighbors mom passed away, as well as my friends mother. Those events took away some of the holiday spirit. But today was different: I cleaned in the morning, read a bit in the afternoon, and overall felt more productive. Perhaps the best part of the day was knowing that the paintings for my fence were completed. They look pretty awesome. I'm happy and here are the photos.

I can't wait to show these off. lol But i still need other renovations for the house. It's a start. I wanted something artistic. But knowing that the paintings were complete made me so happy. I'm going to finish reading Rain God tomorrow, it's likely. It's starting to pick up as far as suspense...i feel a dramatic conclusion coming up.

Starting Over

Another set of months without a post, although I have been doing so with facebook. Blogger doesn't get as good responses though, as far as immediate. But it is more of a journal/diary and allows me to write more. A lot of changes in life, but i'm not going to try and catch readers up with everything. Just the most important ones (or those I have dwelled on).
1. proposal
2. mother's illness
3. death of friends mom
4. vacation (that is not really vacation)

Eventually I might mention each. Currently im reading Rain God by Arturo Islas. I was supposed to read it for a graduate course, but I didn't have time start it. I started it again some time ago, but got as far as the first time I began reading it. This time around I'm finally getting farther. It's a good story, but not attracting my attention so much.
Sometimes I think I'm still trying to find an identity for this blog. Especially with all this time off, the first blog back is usually just to sort out what happened since last post.
No publications as of yet which somewhat worries me, but I think I will keep on trying until I get something. Two years I think since I was last published. That is probably to long and I should have kept submitting. Although I don't want to submit to strictly "chicano" publications. I want for my "pocho" theme to be accepted by more maintstream areas. But without a response from the publications I don't know why my poems are being rejected. In the meanwhile I will continue doing volunteering and creating chapbooks. Life is a little bit of everything, not all one passion.